In my last post, 200 years ago ... Adoniram & Ann Judson: Don't waste YOUR marriage, I wrote about Adoniram and Ann Hasseltine Judson and included there Adoniram's letter to Ann's parents asking for her hand in marriage and a later letter he wrote to Ann during the time of their engagement. Both letters clearly spelled out the dangers and perils that lay ahead for Ann and him in the missionary cause.
Tapping into James Davis Knowles' "Memoir of Ann H. Judson: Missionary to Burmah," I'd like to give you a glimpse into the mind and heart of Ann Hasseltine as she laid the proposal of marriage and the prospect of missions before the Lord, how she applied herself diligently to seek the counsel of the Almighty, the only wise God, so she might discern the wisdom that descends from above, thus proving the good, acceptable and pleasing will of the Lord. Ann's example brings to mind King Jehoshaphat (II Chronicles 20) and King Hezekiah (II Kings 19, II Chronicles 32 & Isaiah 37).
II Kings 19:14 Hezekiah received the letter from the hand of the messengers and read it; and Hezekiah went up to the house of the LORD and spread it before the LORD.
(I'd encourage you to read the full accounts in your Bible.) Shouldn't the people of God be seeking the face of their God and spreading our concerns out before Him? Is the LORD your recourse – or is He your last result when all other earthly means fail you? Please consider that as we seek the LORD and discern and follow His wisdom and His will for us in the smallest things, and as we are obedient, He will entrust more and more to us.
(Please note: I've included in indented form a couple footnotes immediately following the applicable text from the Memoir...)
She was thus placed in a situation of peculiar difficulty and delicacy. The influence which her affections ought to have, in deciding a question of this kind, it would not, in ordinary cases, have been difficult to determine. But in this case, her embarrassment was increased, by the conflict which might arise between affection and duty. A person so conscientious as she was, would wish to form a decision on the important question of her duty, respecting missionary labors, uninfluenced by any personal considerations. Hesitation to assume an office so responsible, and so arduous, would spring up in any mind; but Miss Hasseltine was required to decide on this point, in connexion with another, itself of the utmost consequence to her individual happiness. It was impossible to divest herself of her personal feelings, and she might have some painful suspicions, lest her affections might bias her decision to become a Missionary; while female delicacy and honor would forbid her to bestow her hand, merely as a preliminary and necessary arrangement.
There was another circumstance which greatly 'increased the difficulty of a decision. No female had ever left America as a Missionary to the heathen. "The general opinion was decidedly opposed to the measure. It was deemed wild and romantic in the extreme, and altogether inconsistent with prudence and delicacy. Miss H. had no example to guide and allure her. She met with no encouragement from the greater part of those persons, to whom she applied for counsel. Some expressed strong disapprobation of the project. Others would give no opinion. Two or three individuals, whom it might not be proper to name, were steady, affectionate advisers, and encouraged her to go. With these exceptions, she was forced to decide from her own convictions of duty, and her own sense of fitness and expediency.'*
It was well for the cause of Missions, that God assigned to Miss Hasseltine the honorable yet difficult office of leading the way in this great enterprise. Her adventurous spirit and her decision of character eminently fitted her to resolve, where others would hesitate, and to advance, where others might retreat. She did decide to go, and her determination, without doubt, has had some effect on the minds of other females, who have since followed her example.†
"A female friend called upon us this morning. She informed me of her determination to quit her native land, to endure the sufferings of a Christian amongst heathen nations—to spend her days in India's sultry clime. How did this news affect my heart! Is she willing to do all this for God; and shall I refuse to lend my little aid, in a land where divine revelation has shed its clearest rays 1 I have felt more for the salvation of the heathen, this day, than I recollect to have felt through my whole past life.
"How dreadful their situation! What heart but would bleed at the idea of the sufferings they endure to obtain the joys of paradise! What can I do, that the light of the Gospel may shine upon them? They are perishing for lack of knowledge, while I enjoy the glorious privileges of a Christian land! Great God, direct me! O make me in some way beneficial to immortal souls."
To Mrs. Judson undoubtedly belongs the praise of being the first American female, who resolved to leave her friends and country, to bear the Gospel to the heathen in foreign climes.
Her journal at this time shows that her mind was in a state of extreme anxiety, and that she resorted for direction and help to Him who gives wisdom to the ignorant, and who guides the meek in judgment:
"Aug. 8, 1810. Endeavoured to commit myself entirely to God, to be disposed of according to his pleasure. He is now trying my faith and confidence in him, by presenting dark and gloomy prospects, that I may be enabled, through divine grace, to gain an ascendency over my selfish and rebellious spirit, and prefer the will of God to my own. I do feel that his service is my delight. Might I but be the means of converting a single soul, it would be worth spending all my days to accomplish. Yes, I feel willing to be placed in that situation, in which I can do most good, though it were to carry the Gospel to the distant, benighted heathen.
"Sept. 10. For several weeks past, my mind has been greatly agitated. An opportunity has been presented to me, of spending my days among the heathen, in attempting to persuade them to receive the Gospel. Were I convinced of its being a call from God, and that it would be more pleasing to him, for me to spend my life in this way than in any other, I think I should be willing to relinquish every earthly object, and, in full view of dangers and hardships, give myself up to the great work.
"A consideration of this subject has occasioned much self-examination, to know on what my hopes were founded, and whether my love to Jesus was sufficiently strong to induce me to forsake all for his cause. At times I have felt satisfied, that I loved him, on account of his own glorious perfections, and have been desirous that he should do with me as he should please, and place me in that situation, in which I can he most useful. I have felt great satisfaction in committing this case to God, knowing that he has a perfect understanding of the issue of all events, is infinitely wise to select the means best calculated to bring about the most important ends, and is able and willing to make the path of duty plain before me, and incline me to walk therein. At other times, I have felt ready to sink, being distressed with fears about my spiritual state, and appalled at the prospect of pain and suffering, to which my nature is so averse, and apprehensive, that when assailed by temptation, or exposed to danger and death, I should not be able to endure, as seeing Him who is invisible. But I now feel willing to leave it entirely with God. He is the fountain of all grace; and if he has designed me to be a promoter of his cause, among those who know him not, he can quality me for the work, and enable me to bear whatever he is pleased to inflict. I am fully satisfied, that difficulties and trials are more conducive, than ease and prosperity, to promote my growth in grace, and cherish an habitual sense of dependence on God. While the latter please my animal nature, and lead me to seek happiness in creature enjoyments, the former afford convincing proofs that this life is designed to be a state of trial, and not a state of rest, and thus tend to wean me from the world, and make me look up to heaven as my home. Time appears nothing when compared with eternity, and yet events the most momentous depend on the improvement of these fleeting years. O Jesus, direct me, and I am safe; use me in thy service, and I ask no more. I would not choose my portion of work, or place of labor; only let me know thy will, and I will readily comply.
"Oct. 28. My mind has still been agitated for two or three weeks past, in regard to the above mentioned subject. But I have, at all times, felt a disposition to leave it with God, and trust in him to direct me. I have, at length, come to the conclusion, that if nothing in providence appears to prevent, I must spend my days in a heathen land. I am a creature of God, and he has an undoubted right to do with me, as seemeth good in his sight. I rejoice that I am in his hands—that he is everywhere present, and can protect me in one place as well as in another. He has my heart in his hands; and when I am called to face danger, to pass through scenes of terror and distress, he can inspire me with fortitude, and enable me to trust in him. Jesus is faithful; his promises are precious. Were it not for these considerations, I should, with my present prospects, sink down in despair, especially as no female has to my knowledge ever left the shores of America, to spend her life among the heathen; nor do I yet know that I shall have a single female companion. But God is my witness, that I have not dared to decline the offer that has been made me, though so many are ready to call it a 'wild, romantic undertaking.' If I have been deceived in thinking it my duty to go to the heathen, I humbly pray, that I may be undeceived, and prevented from going. But whether I spend my days in India or America, I desire to spend them in the service of God, and be prepared to spend an eternity in his presence. O Jesus, make me live to thee, and I desire no more.
"Nov. 25. Sabbath. Have spent part of this holy day in fasting and prayer on account of the darkness of my mind, and the many internal trials of a spiritual nature that I have lately experienced. Though destitute of that engagedness I could desire, I had some freedom in pouring out my soul to God, Had some confidence that he would grant my petitions. When I consider the great wickedness of my heart, I hardly venture to approach the throne of grace. But when I recollect, that God has promised to hear the cries of the poor and needy, and that he has even given his Son to die for those who are sunk deep in sin, I find some encouragement to prostrate myself before the mercy seat, and plead the divine promises. Of late, I have had but little enjoyment, though my mind has been constantly exercised with divine truth. Yet I hope, that God will overrule these trials for my good. I have long since given myself to God; he has an undoubted right to dispose of me, and try me as he pleases. Though he slay me, yet will I trust in him.
"He who has styled himself a prayer hearing God, graciously manifested himself to my soul, and made it easy and pleasant to pray. Felt a longing desire for more grace, for more unreserved devotedness to God. When I get near to God, and discern the excellence of the character of the Lord Jesus, and especially his power and willingness to save, I feel desirous that the whole world should become acquainted with this Saviour. I am not only willing to Spend my days among the heathen, in attempting to enlighten and save them, but I find much pleasure in the prospect. Yes, I am quite willing to give up temporal comforts, and live a life of hardship and trial, if it be the will of God.
'I can be safe, and free from care,
On any shore, since God is there.'
"Oct. Sabbath—(probably 1811.) Another holy day calls me to the house of God. O that I may enjoy his presence, and rest in him. This morning had some faint views of my unworthiness and nothingness before God. Felt ashamed, that I had ever indulged the least complacency in myself, when I am so exceedingly depraved. I can find no words to express my own vileness; and yet I sometimes exalt myself, and wonder the Supreme Being takes no more notice of my prayers, and gives me no more grace. This evening attended a female prayer meeting. Felt solemn and engaged in prayer. Longed for clearer views of God, and stronger confidence in him. Made a new dedication of myself to God. Felt perfectly willing to give up my friends and earthly comforts, provided I might, in exile, enjoy the presence of God. I never felt more engaged in prayer for special grace, to prepare me for my great undertaking, than this evening. I am confident God will support me in every trying hour. I have strong hope, that in giving me such an opportunity of laboring for him, he will make me peculiarly useful. No matter where I am, if I do but serve the infinitely blessed God; and it is my comfort, that he can prepare me to serve him. Blessed Jesus, I am thine forever. Do with me what thou wilt; lead me in the path in which thou wouldst have me go, and it is enough.
"Nov. 23. My heart has been quite revived this evening with spiritual things. Had some views of the excellent nature of the kingdom of Christ. Longed, above all things, to have it advanced. Felt an ardent desire to be instrumental of spreading the knowledge of the Redeemer's name, m i heathen land. Felt it a great, an undeserved privilege, to have an opportunity of going. Yes, I think I would rather go to India, among the heathen, notwithstanding the almost insurmountable difficulties in the way, than to stay at home and enjoy the comforts and luxuries of life. Faith in Christ will enable me to bear trials, however severe. My hope in his powerful protection animates me to persevere in my purpose. O, if he will condescend to make me useful m promoting his kingdom, I care not where I perform his work, nor how hard it be. Behold the handmaid of the Lord; be it unto me according to thy word."
The resolution of Mr. and Mrs. Judson, to devote themselves to the service of their Saviour as Missionaries, was not formed in the ardor of youthful enthusiasm. It was not the impulse of an adventurous spirit, panting for scenes of difficulty and danger. They had cherished no romantic views of the missionary enterprise. They had calmly estimated its hazards and its toils. They foresaw what it would cost them, and the issue to which it would probably lead them both. They knew well what they must do and suffer; and they yielded themselves as willing sacrifices, for the sake of the far distant heathen.
How are you deciding questions of duty?
Are you seeking the wisdom that comes from above?
Are you deciding questions of duty in a summary manner – or in the godly manner in which Miss Hasseltine engaged herself?
James 3:11 Does a spring pour forth from the same opening both fresh and salt water? 12 Can a fig tree, my brothers, bear olives, or a grapevine produce figs? Neither can a salt pond yield fresh water.
13 Who is wise and understanding among you? By his good conduct let him show his works in the meekness of wisdom. 14 But if you have bitter jealousy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast and be false to the truth. 15 This is not the wisdom that comes down from above, but is earthly, unspiritual, demonic. 16 For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there will be disorder and every vile practice. 17 But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits, impartial and sincere. 18 And a harvest of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace.
4:1 What causes quarrels and what causes fights among you? Is it not this, that your passions are at war within you? 2 You desire and do not have, so you murder. You covet and cannot obtain, so you fight and quarrel. You do not have, because you do not ask. 3 You ask and do not receive, because you ask wrongly, to spend it on your passions. 4 You adulterous people! Do you not know that friendship with the world is enmity with God? Therefore whoever wishes to be a friend of the world makes himself an enemy of God. 5 Or do you suppose it is to no purpose that the Scripture says, “He yearns jealously over the spirit that he has made to dwell in us”? 6 But he gives more grace. Therefore it says, “God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble.” 7 Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. 8 Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded. 9 Be wretched and mourn and weep. Let your laughter be turned to mourning and your joy to gloom. 10 Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will exalt you.
Romans 12:1 I appeal to you therefore, brothers, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship. 2 Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.
What kind of water are you sending forth?
What kind of fruit are you bearing?
Are you showing yourself to be wise and understanding?
You may be praying to God, and in fact, you may be praying quite zealously – but are you asking wrongly?
Are you continuing to make yourself friend of the world, thus making yourself an enemy of God?
How are you spending your time?
Are you putting yourself in situations so you cannot help but continue to be conformed to this world,
rather than being transformed by the renewing of your mind?
How much time are you spending in the presence of God, in reading and reflecting upon His words to you in the Holy Bible?
If you continue to immerse yourself in the world, how can ever expect to walk in the way of Ann Hasseltine, so by testing you might discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect?
If you continue to immerse yourself in the world, how can you expect to obey God's command to you to present yourself a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God?
Having known the mercies of God, you are Christ's, and this is God's appeal to you today:
that you be renewed in your mind so you might know God's will and walk in it.
Know this:
the Spirit of God is yearning jealously and
God will not be mocked.
I Corinthians 6:19 Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, 20 for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.
May the God of grace grant us more grace so we might...
submit ourselves to God,
resist the devil, so he might flee from us.
May the God of grace grant us more grace so we might...
draw near to God, and trust that He will draw near to us.
May the God of grace grant us more grace so we might...
see ourselves as God sees us:
as sinners in need of cleansing our hands,
and double-minded in need of purifying our hearts.
May we be wretched and mourn and weep.
May our laughter be turned to mourning and our joy to gloom.
May we humble ourselves before the Lord, and trust he will exalt us.
May the God of grace put into us a desire to seek more grace, for more unreserved devotedness to God, so we might be importunate in prayer and go boldly to the throne of grace, for Christ Jesus is the fountain of all grace!
May the God of grace work in us as He worked in Ann Hasseltine, that His love might increasingly constrain us and we might freely profess our desire to be His, and offer ourselves to Him as willing sacrifices – for there is no true joy anywhere else!
Endeavoured to commit myself entirely to God, to be disposed of according to his pleasure. He is now trying my faith and confidence in him, by presenting dark and gloomy prospects, that I may be enabled, through divine grace, to gain an ascendency over my selfish and rebellious spirit, and prefer the will of God to my own. I do feel that his service is my delight...Felt perfectly willing to give up my friends and earthly comforts, provided I might, in exile, enjoy the presence of God.
You make known to me the path of life;
in your presence there is fullness of joy;
at your right hand are pleasures forevermore.
Reference: "Memoir of Ann H. Judson: Missionary to Burmah: by James Davis Knowles (Boston: Gould, Kendall, and Lincoln) 1846, 42-49. You can access the book at <http://www.reformedreader.org/biography/anne.h.judson/anne.h.judson.contents.htm> or <http://books.google.com/books?id=bb4u5bmWDGUC&printsec=frontcover#v=onepage&q&f=false>.
Harriet Newell, the woman in the footnote, did end up sailing to Calcutta along with her husband, Samuel Newell, and Ann and Adoniram Judson. They were expelled from India and ended up in Mauritius, where she died on November 30, 1812. "Mrs. Harriet Newell, the first American martyr to Foreign Missions, had only just survived the tempestuous voyage from Calcutta, and had been laid in the 'heathy ground' of Mauritius: one who 'for the love of Christ and immortal souls, left the bosom of her friends, and found an early grave in a land of strangers.' She never repented leavingher native country. When informed by her physician of her approaching death, she lifted up her hands in triumph, and exclaimed: 'Oh, glorious intelligence!'" (from p. 46-47 of "The Life of Adoniram Judson" by Edward Judson)
For more about the Judsons:
Biography of Ann_Hasseltine at the Gospel Fellowship Association
John Piper's biographical message on Adoniram Judson, "How Few There Are Who Die So Hard! Suffering and Success in the Life of Adoniram Judson: The Cost of Bringing Christ to Burma" <http://www.desiringgod.org/resource-library/biographies/how-few-there-are-who-die-so-hard>
"The Life of Adoniram Judson" by Edward Judson, New York: Anson D. F. Randolph & Company, 1883, available at <http://books.google.com/books?id=vUsoAAAAYAAJ&printsec=frontcover#v=onepage&q&f=false> or <http://www.reformedreader.org/rbb/judson/biography.htm>
"Apostle of the Love of Christ in Burma" by Eugene Myers Harrison at <http://www.reformedreader.org/rbb/judson/ajbio.htm>
Related posts...
- Is your ambition holy? / What are you living for? (Louis Paul Lehman) | The Christian's Aim
- Are you robbing God? Where is God telling you to "Rise and go!" for the joy of others?
- adopting God's purpose for the nations is for you joy & His glory
- the infinite significance of the eternal Kingdom
- occupy ~ do you seek your own – or the things of Christ? does His Spirit occupy?
- In which circle do you take your stand? ~ Are you a true disciple? (Hewitson's holy ambition)
- who is your master? (Bible Reading - Matthew)
- the devil and God, passion and vision, lies and truth
- Do My Prayers Glorify God?
- some reflections about prayer
- Bible Reading: Where are the good figs? (Jeremiah 24)
- Lent II.-God's calling: "As my Father hath sent Me, so send I you." | Oswald Chambers
- Lent V. - You follow me! (Are we steadfastly setting our faces to His will?)
- our yearnings & desires & God's Mission (Isaiah 26:9)
- Why read Christian biography? To help us examine our love for God.
- Thank you, Noël Piper (Thank you, pastor's wives)
- Father's Day ~ William Carey & his son | duty, risk & the obedient Son
- the world says . . . You say . . . I say (a prayer of dedication)
- Remember last year
- Be not an Esau (Genesis 25:29-34, Hebrews 12:15-17)
- Half a heart, half a heart (How long? If the LORD is God, follow Him)
- dedication 2010 (reflections on God's Word & God's grace)
- you say you want Jesus
- His seed (If ye be Christ's ~ He came seeking fruit)
More on the spiritual discipline of Bible reading/reflection...
- Considering Jesus: (1) Making time to consider Jesus
- Considering Jesus: (2) Why do we do quiet time anyhow?
- take to heart ALL the words (more on quiet time)
- Get gnawing, put your nose down in the Book to feed the white-hot flame of God's gift
- "Garbage In" (Are you truly His disciple?)
- Linger, linger, linger – so you might know God's love
Scripture quotations are taken from The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. Copyright ©2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved.
Work found at http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ann_Hasseltine / CC BY-SA 3.0 / {{PD-Art|PD-old-75}}
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