In his sermon "The Importance of Spiritual Growth," Dr. Martyn Lloyd-Jones (ML-J) cited these words of Charles Haddon Spurgeon:

"There is a point in grace which is as much above the ordinary Christian as the ordinary Christian is above the worldling."

On August 21, 2012, as part of a reflective/retrospective post on my birthday, I wrote the following about those words of Spurgeon:

The following spring [of 2008], while away on a private retreat, I listened to a portion of Martyn Lloyd-Jones' sermon on Ephesians 3:16:

That he would grant you, according to the riches of his glory, to be strengthened with might by his Spirit in the inner man... (KJV)

There are many ways we can keep track of the Ebenezers in our lives. And included in those for me are my own personal journals and my blogging.

In my post dated May 29, 2008, I'd referenced a quotation which ML-J gave from Spurgeon in that sermon:

"There is a point in grace which is as much above the ordinary Christian as the ordinary Christian is above the worldling."

This morning, I looked through my journals (my spiral notebooks which are "filed" in a cardboard box in the corner of the bedroom), and I found the notebook from that time with the quotation written down along with some notes I'd taken from the sermon. No, there was no lightning bolt at the time, but a seed was planted: a deeper desire and hunger and thirst for Christ had been imparted into my soul through the Holy Spirit. I vividly remember the day when I sat on the bed in that retreat center and listened to that sermon and then knelt down by the bed. I had heard something that day that did further shaking to my complacent, safe, self-sufficient, works-oriented, lukewarm Americanized Christianity. Even though I knew my present reality at that point in time was so very far from that point in grace, and even though I knew I was approaching holy ground to even consider such a possibility, yet all the same, that possibility began to captivate me and my hunger and thirst grew. I knew there was more to Christianity than I'd imagined... I was slowly coming to the realization, much like Oswald Chambers wrote:  "But I knew that if what I had was all the Christianity there was, the thing was a fraud." (Please see my post here for more on that.)

* * *

I was only recently able to locate the Spurgeon sermon in which that quotation was found. I've included a few excerpts from that sermon below. (One note on the sermon: regarding the paragraph beginning with "The great policy of Satan..." – it's clear that the threats to the 21st century Church have multiplied beyond those at the time this sermon was first preached in 1869.) Before those excerpts, I've included Scripture, some other quotations, as well as a poem I've written. In presenting all these things to you, my prayer is that God might strengthen you to entreat Him for grace upon grace, that you would not be complacent with having received the former rain – that your Christianity would not be fraudulent – but you would seek God's face in earnest for the latter rain, so you might come to that point in grace which is as much above the ordinary Christian as the ordinary Christian is above the worldling... Hosea 6:1 Come, and let us return unto the LORD: for he hath torn, and he will heal us; he hath smitten, and he will bind us up. 2 After two days will he revive us: in the third day he will raise us up, and we shall live in his sight. 3 Then shall we know, if we follow on to know the LORD: his going forth is prepared as the morning; and he shall come unto us as the rain, as the latter and former rain unto the earth.

~ That we might increase our joy in the LORD, Karen

Luke 11:9 And I say unto you, Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you. 10 For every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened. 11 If a son shall ask bread of any of you that is a father, will he give him a stone? or if he ask a fish, will he for a fish give him a serpent? 12 Or if he shall ask an egg, will he offer him a scorpion? 

13 If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts unto your children: how much more shall your heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to them that ask him?

Zechariah 10:1 Ask ye of the LORD rain in the time of the latter rain; so the LORD shall make bright clouds, and give them showers of rain, to every one grass in the field.

"See how ready God is to succour and relieve his people, how he waits to be gracious; as soon as ever they humble themselves under this hand, and pray, and seek his face, he immediately meets them with his favours. They prayed that God would spare them, and see here with what good words and comfortable words he answered them; for God's promises are real answers to the prayers of faith, because with him saying and doing are not two things."

~ Matthew Henry on Joel 2:18-27

Psalm 119:58
I intreated thy favour with my whole heart:
be merciful unto me according to thy word.

Once More I Entreat
(the Former AND the Latter Rain)
~ a birthday exultation (August 23, 2013) ~

(based in part upon Charles Haddon Spurgeon's sermon
"The Former and the Latter Rain" No. 880)

In vain I'd sought shadows and earthly gold,
Then Truest Treasure which waxes not old

Through the Spirit, given second birth,
Sight imparted to see my great dearth

With my whole heart did I entreat
Saving favor from the mercy seat

The former rain dropped at Thy Word
Before I spoke, my plea was heard

By Lamb's blood, the veil was rent
With full acceptance I made the ascent

But this be my greatest and chiefest regret:
Though two decades seated with Mephibosheth,

'Twas but a nominal supping, devoid of flavor,
Had nary a true taste or a sensible savor

Seeing but not perceiving – was this Life!?
Nay, only a pretense, counterfeit in disguise

"Ah! If this is Christianity, 'tis but a fraud!"
In Your kindness came chastening rod

Variegated trials, the whirlwind, Your billows
With Jacob, I struggled, and wetted my pillow

To behold Your Beauty – my one desire
O! To taste the Fount of baptismal fire!

For the latter rain I was importunately intent
I would not let Thee go, till the heavens rent

Achsah's cry ~ "the sure mark of grace":
Having found grace, I seek Thy grace!

With whole heart, once more I entreat
Latter rain from Thy mercy seat

My Rock, burst forth! O! Wellspring of favor!
Blessed are all who seek higher savor!

For my Bridegroom, I pant with mouth open wide:
To know Him - Ah! this is religion bona fide! 

My Beloved, be like a gazelle! O! Make haste!
Fill this thirsty pilgrim with grace upon grace!

Above the ordinary, for all the saints who dare
Welcome cross and brokenness – breathe rarefied air!

Ask, seek, and knock at His celestial door
Alarm you should feel if you desire no more

To prepare the corn for the time of harvest
Beg the latter rain to revive and refresh

Bountiful effusion of Christ, remarkable visitation,
'Tis nothing short of a second conversion!

Wrestling cry of God's elect: sweet incense arising
How can He spurn the groanings of His needy offspring?

For such a point in grace, bow down and earnestly entreat,
Our heavenly Father meets all who diligently seek

With favors in abundance ~ our Lord's delights ~
Succoring His children to leap on the heights!

"It is a sure mark of grace to desire more."
~ Robert Murray M'Cheyne ~

"In Jesus is our store,
Grace issues from his throne;
Whoever says, 'I want no more,'
Confesses he has none.
~ William Cowper ~

Hosea 12:4 Yes, he [Jacob] struggled with the Angel and prevailed; He wept, and sought favor from Him. He found Him in Bethel, And there He spoke to us – 5 That is, the LORD God of hosts. The LORD is His memorial. (NKJV)

Isaiah 29:17 Is it not yet a very little while, and Lebanon shall be turned into a fruitful field, and the fruitful field shall be esteemed as a forest? 18 And in that day shall the deaf hear the words of the book, and the eyes of the blind shall see out of obscurity, and out of darkness. 19 The meek also shall increase their joy in the LORD, and the poor among men shall rejoice in the Holy One of Israel.

Excerpts from Charles Haddon Spurgeon's sermon "The Former and the Latter Rain" (HT: http://www.ccel.org/print/spurgeon/sermons15/xxxiii, emphasis mine)

"Let us now fear the Lord our God, who gives rain, both the former and the latter, in its season. He reserves for us the appointed weeks of the harvest." - Jeremiah 5:24

It is very usual in the life of Grace for the soul to receive in later years, a second very remarkable visitation of the Holy Spirit, which may be compared to the latter rain. As I told you, the latter rain was sent to plump out the wheat and make it full and mature, ready for the after-harvest ripening. So there is a time of special Grace granted to saints, to prepare them for Heaven, to make them completely meet to be partakers of the inheritance of the saints in light. To some, this is given in the form of what has very commonly, and I think correctly, been called a second conversion. "When you are converted, strengthen your Brethren," was Christ's remark to Peter, who was even then a converted man.

My Brothers and Sisters, there is a point in Grace as much above the ordinary Christian, as the ordinary Christian is above the worldling. Believe me, the life of Divine Grace is no dead level, it is not a low country, a vast flat. There are mountains and there are valleys. There are tribes of Christians who live in the valleys, like the poor Swiss of the Valais, who live in the midst of the mist, where fever has its lair and the frame is languid and enfeebled. Such dwellers in the lowlands of unbelief are forever doubting, fearing, troubled about their interest in Christ and tossed to and fro. But there are other Believers, who, by God's Grace, have climbed the mountain of full assurance and near communion. Their place is with the eagle in his eyrie, high aloft.

They are like the strong mountaineer who has trod the virgin snow, who has breathed the fresh, free air of the Alpine regions and therefore his sinews are braced and limbs are vigorous. These are they who do great exploits, being mighty men, men of renown. The saints who dwell on high in the clear atmosphere of faith are rejoicing Christians, holy and devout men, doing service for the Master all over the world and everywhere conquerors through Him that loved them. And I desire—oh, how earnestly I desire you to be such men and women! My craving is that all of you, my Beloved, who have been watered by the former rain, may also be refreshed by a more than ordinary latter rain which shall make you more than ordinary Christians—bringing you beyond the blade period and the ear period—into the full corn in the ear!

The great policy of Satan of late with the Church has been this—not so much to attack her with open infidelity—for really all the infidelity there is in England does not materially affect Churches worthy of the name except to an almost infinitesimal extent. There is a deal more made of skepticism in certain quarters than there is any need for. Skeptics seldom get among our Christian people. At least I do not meet with them in my enquiries, nor do I see them associating with Christians of my association. The plan Satan seems to have adopted is not that of attacking our doctrine, but that of
preventing, as far as he can, our raising in our midst a race of eminent and advanced Christians. Pharaoh said, "Destroy the male children." Satan seems to say, "Stop the male children from fulfilling their growth."

We are well enough in our way after the common run of manhood. We believe in Christ. We love Him and contribute something to His cause, We preach and we pray. We are a respectable sort of people, but we do not grow to maturity or attain "unto the first three." We have in this age but few giants in Divine Grace who rise head and shoulders above the common height—men to lead us on in deeds of heroism and efforts of unstaggering faith. After all, the work of the Christian Church, though it must be done by all, often owes its being done to single individuals of remarkable Grace. In this degenerate time we are very much in need of what Israel had in the days of the Judges—there were raised up among them leaders who judged Israel and were the terror of her foes.

Oh, if the Church, today, had in her midst a race of heroes! If only our missionary operations could be attended with the holy chivalry which marked the Church in the early days! If only we could have back Apostles and martyrs, or even such as Carey and Judson, what wonders would be worked! We have fallen upon a race of dwarfs and are content, to a great extent, to have it so. There was once in London a club of small men whose qualification for membership lay in their not exceeding five feet in height. These dwarfs held, or pretended to hold, the opinion that they were nearer the perfection of manhood than others, for they argued that primeval men had been far more gigantic than the present race and consequently the way of progress was to grow less and less, and that the human race, as it perfected itself, would become as diminutive as themselves.

Such a club of Christians might be established in London and without any difficulty might attain to an enormously numerous membership—for the notion is common that our dwarfish Christianity is, after all, the standard! And many even imagine that nobler Christians are enthusiasts, fanatical and hot-blooded—while we are cool because we are wise and indifferent—because we are intelligent. We must get rid of all this nonsense! The fact is, the most of us are vastly inferior to the early Christians, who, as I take it, were persecuted because they were thoroughly Christians and we are not persecuted because we hardly are Christians at all! They were so earnest in the propagation of the Redeemer's kingdom, that they became the nuisance of the age in which they lived.

. . .

Brothers [and sisters], be encouraged! A latter rain is yet possible. Seek it! That you need it so much is a cause for sorrow, but if you really feel your need of it, be glad that the Lord works in you such sacred desires. If you did not feel a need for more Divine Grace it would be a reason for alarm. But to be conscious that all that God did by you in the past has not qualified you to do anything without Him now—to feel that you lean entirely upon His strength now, as much as ever— is to be in a condition in which it shall be right and proper for God to bless you abundantly.

Please note: In addition to the ML-J sermon cited above, you can access for free over 1600 other audio sermons of The Doctor courtesy of the MLJ Trust here. You can also sign up for the weekly podcast through Living Grace Ministries at oneplace.com: http://www.oneplace.com/ministries/living-grace/listen/. They're currently broadcasting sermons from ML-J's Ephesians series.

Related:

• my posts on nominal Christianity
• my posts on true and false religion

You Will Know the Truth and the Truth Will Set You Free from Desiring God on Vimeo.

http://www.desiringgod.org/resource-library/sermons/you-will-know-the-truth-and-the-truth-will-set-you-free

(Excerpt taken from the printed sermon text found at the link above...)

My aim in this message is that you would experience Jesus, the sovereign, risen, living Lord of the universe, as the source and content of real freedom in your life.

For this to happen, we need two things: We need God's liberating truth and we need God's liberating grace. Which means I need to preach God's word, and pray for God's power.

So let's read the Bible passage that I will speak from, and then I will pray. John 8:30–36:

As he was saying these things, many believed in him. So Jesus said to the Jews who had believed in him, "If you abide in my word, you are truly my disciples, and you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free." They answered him, "We are offspring of Abraham and have never been enslaved to anyone. How is it that you say, 'You will become free'?" Jesus answered them, "Truly, truly, I say to you, everyone who commits sin is a slave to sin. The slave does not remain in the house forever; the son remains forever. So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed.

Lord, open our eyes to your liberating truth—to yourself—and powerfully grant us to be set free from our bondage to sin. In Jesus' name, Amen.

. . .

We All Want to Be Free

I take it for a certainty that everyone in this room wants to be free in the deepest, fullest sense. If the opposite is bondage and slavery, no one here wants that. You may be enslaved to some habits that are very pleasurable, and in that sense love your slavery. But when you step back from the pleasures and consider happiness without that slavery, you would like to be done with bondage. You would like to be happy in freedom, not a slave to pleasant addictions. We all want to be free.

And in verse 36 of John 8, Jesus says, "So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed." That is what we are after. "Free indeed." Really free. Freedom in its deepest and fullest meaning. Jesus offers us that this morning. This is Easter. The celebration of the resurrection of Jesus from the dead. He is alive. He is not mere memory. A mere historical figure like Caesar or Shakespeare or John Kennedy. He is back from the dead with a new glorious body. He is alive and reigning as the king of the universe, and he is making this offer of real freedom to all of us today.

. . .

What Full Freedom Is

There are at least four kinds of freedom. And each one adds a crucial dimension of freedom to the last until we get to the full freedom—"free indeed." Let me try to sum up these four kinds of freedom in one definition of full and complete freedom: You are fully free—completely free, free indeed—when you have the desire, the ability, and the opportunity to do what will make you happy in a thousand years. Or we could say, You are fully free when you have the desire, the ability, and the opportunity to do what will leave you no regrets forever.

• If you don't have the desire to do a thing, you are not fully free to do it. Oh, you may muster the will power to do what you don't want to do, but nobody calls that full freedom. It's not the way we want to live. There is a constraint and pressure on us that we don't want.

• And if you have the desire to do something, but no ability to do it, you are not free to do it.

• And if you have the desire and the ability to do something, but no opportunity to do it, you are not free to do it.

• And if you have the desire to do something, and the ability to do it, and the opportunity to do it, but it destroys you in the end, you are not fully free—not free indeed.

To be fully free, we must have the desire, the ability, and the opportunity to do what will make us happy forever. No regrets. And only Jesus, the Son of God who died and rose for us, can make that possible. If the Son shall set you free, you shall be free indeed. To be happy forever, our sins must be forgiven and God's wrath removed and Christ must become our supreme Treasure. Only Jesus can do that. In fact, he has already done it. He died for our sins. He absorbed God's wrath. And he rose from the dead and is today therefore supremely precious. And he offers us that now as a free gift.

By John Piper. ©2013 Desiring God Foundation. Website: desiringGod.org

(Letter 163 in my series of posts on assurance and fighting for joy...)

Yesterday @TheXangaTeam announced they're going to a paid blogging platform, and that there is a possibility that Xanga may be shutting down for good after July 15 (link).
 
Many thoughts went through my head, the primary one being that I really wanted to have a publicly saved record of what I'd written here in case Xanga does end up shutting its doors for good. I do have all the archives of my blogs downloaded onto my laptop, so that's not really the issue. I started blogging at this site in 2007, and since then I added a couple more blogs...

• this site (http://napthali_deer.xanga.com), opened 2/12/2007, with 1344 public posts.
• tent of meeting (http://tent_of_meeting.xanga.com), opened 3/28/2009, with 204 public posts.
• deerlife (http://deerlife.xanga.com), opened 3/14/2010, with 70 public posts.

If you do the math, that's 1618 public posts, not including this one. Now, granted, as I reread a lot of my first posts here, I squirm, as I had been barely on the edge of and just beginning to dip my toes into the vast and glorious ocean of the doctrines of grace (a.k.a. Calvinism) –– but now I've taken the full plunge! But I have decided to keep all my posts as I had first written them, as they are for a record of the journey God has had me on.

In light of the Xanga announcement yesterday, I could see I was beginning to react out of my flesh, rather than respond in God's Spirit, and I knew I wasn't in a very good place at all –– far from it! I was becoming fearful, worried, upset, and anxious. I was quickly sliding down into that noxious place of grumbling, murmuring, and whining –- headed full-steam down a path very far away from exhibiting the fruit of the Spirit!

I went for a walk yesterday afternoon and tried to listen to some sermons to numb and distract myself, to escape and avoid the circumstance that was looming in front of me –– and in a vain and futile attempt to avoid looking at my own deceitful and desperately wicked heart.

As I was walking, I was chewing on the sovereignty of God in permitting this to happen: for God to lead me here to Xanga and then to lead me to the possibility that all I've written here could be snuffed out very soon...

Then, in His merciful kindness, the Hound of Heaven came down that path pursuing me (Psalm 23:6) and began to shake me and bring me back to my senses with these verses from Colossians 1:

15  He [the Lord Jesus Christ] is the image of the invisible God, the firstborn of all creation. 16  For by him all things were created, in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or dominions or rulers or authorities—all things were created through him and for him. 17  And he is before all things, and in him all things hold together. 18  And he is the head of the body, the church. He is the beginning, the firstborn from the dead, that in everything he might be preeminent. (ESV)

15 He [the Lord Jesus Christ] is the image of the invisible God, the firstborn over all creation.16 For by Him all things were created that are in heaven and that are on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or dominions or principalities or powers. All things were created through Him and for Him. 17 And He is before all things, and in Him all things consist. 18 And He is the head of the body, the church, who is the beginning, the firstborn from the dead, that in all things He may have the preeminence.

God created Xanga. Xanga was created through Him and for Him. And He was and is before all things, including Xanga, and in Him Xanga has held together together. Why?

No matter what's happening here in this little corner of the world known as Xanga, the Lord Jesus Christ will have the preeminence. Xanga or no Xanga –– in spite of all appearances –– the Lord Jesus Christ IS going to get the preeminence! (God's sovereignty continues to be my sanity!)

In Isaiah 63:7-14, there's a recounting of God's deliverance of Israel from Egypt, and we read of God's purposes there:

God's thoughts and God's ways are higher than ours.... inscrutable and unsearchable and unfathomable! Whenever we ... whenever I whine and complain, I am attempting to be His counselor! God, be merciful to me, a sinner!

Romans 11:33 Oh, the depth of the riches both of the wisdom and knowledge of God! How unsearchable are His judgments and His ways past finding out!

34 “For who has known the mind of the Lord?
Or who has become His counselor?”
35 “Or who has first given to Him
And it shall be repaid to him?”
36 For of Him and through Him and to Him are all things, to whom be glory forever. Amen.

God's desire is that His name might be displayed and made everlasting and glorious, that He alone might receive glory forever and ever –– or, as the apostle Paul writes in Colossians 1, that the Lord Jesus Christ might be preeminent.

All things (Xanga's continuing OR closing) are heading toward this one great and glorious and wonderful end (in truth, it's just a beginning!):

Philippians 2:9 Therefore God also has highly exalted Him and given Him the name which is above every name, 10 that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, of those in heaven, and of those on earth, and of those under the earth, 11 and that every tongue should confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.

Revelation 5:8 Now when He had taken the scroll, the four living creatures and the twenty-four elders fell down before the Lamb, each having a harp, and golden bowls full of incense, which are the prayers of the saints. 9 And they sang a new song, saying:

“You are worthy to take the scroll,
And to open its seals;
For You were slain,
And have redeemed us to God by Your blood
Out of every tribe and tongue and people and nation,
10 And have made us kings and priests to our God;
And we shall reign on the earth.”

11 Then I looked, and I heard the voice of many angels around the throne, the living creatures, and the elders; and the number of them was ten thousand times ten thousand, and thousands of thousands, 12 saying with a loud voice:

“Worthy is the Lamb who was slain
To receive power and riches and wisdom,
And strength and honor and glory and blessing!”

13 And every creature which is in heaven and on the earth and under the earth and such as are in the sea, and all that are in them, I heard saying:

“Blessing and honor and glory and power
Be to Him who sits on the throne,
And to the Lamb, forever and ever!”

14 Then the four living creatures said, “Amen!” And the twenty-four elders fell down and worshiped Him who lives forever and ever.

And everything (Xanga's continuance or Xanga's closing) has been foreordained with that end in mind!

In the meantime, as a believer in the Lord Jesus Christ, I am to walk worthy of God's calling... no matter what happens ... whether there will be any Xanga after July 15 or not...

And then I was brought back to these earlier verses in Colossians 1, and I was chastened, for I could see how desperately short I was falling:

9 For this reason we also, since the day we heard it, do not cease to pray for you, and to ask that you may be filled with the knowledge of His will in all wisdom and spiritual understanding; 10 that you may walk worthy of the Lord, fully pleasing Him, being fruitful in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of God; 11 strengthened with all might, according to His glorious power, for all patience and longsuffering with joy...

I WASN'T walking with joy, and I hated that, and I despised myself for that... particularly because of how much I have tasted and seen God's goodness –– how much God has shown Himself to me and has continued to impress His mercy, love, grace and care upon me in so many wonderful ways, pouring out grace upon grace upon grace; and particularly as I've exhorted others that the joy of the Lord is available to all believers (Psalm 86:4), and even how I had just spoken of those verses in Colossians 1 to a friend the night before! ... I was humbled as I saw how very weak I still am, and how faulty and ill-formed my foundation of faith in Jesus Christ still is, and how wholly reliant I must always be on His strengthening and glorious power, and how constant in prayer I must be for His strengthening and glorious power, so I might rejoice in the Lord always, to shine as a light in this dark world, to the praise of His glorious grace!

Unlike the pilgrims scattered abroad, to whom Peter was writing, in my current trial, I was NOT rejoicing with joy inexpressible and full of glory (I Peter 1:3-9). But thanks be to God for His manifold mercies and His kindness in Jesus Christ –– He continues to stretch His hands out to a disobedient and contrary child such as myself, and leads me to repentance through His Holy Spirit through His Holy Word –– which at that point was continuing to pierce and discern and cut deeper and deeper and deeper ... (Job 5:17 Behold, happy is the man whom God corrects; Therefore do not despise the chastening of the Almighty. 18 For He bruises, but He binds up; He wounds, but His hands make whole.)

Hebrews 4:11 Let us therefore be diligent to enter that rest, lest anyone fall according to the same example of disobedience. 12 For the word of God is living and powerful, and sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing even to the division of soul and spirit, and of joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart. 13 And there is no creature hidden from His sight, but all things are naked and open to the eyes of Him to whom we must give account.

After having been reminded of God's sovereignty over all things for the preeminence of the Lord Jesus Christ, and my lack of joy due to my not resting in Christ as I ought –– on top of all that, the story of the fire that burned up years of William Carey's (1761-1834) work was brought to mind. I was already familiar with this event, but I recently heard about it again in John Piper's sermon "The Lord Stood By Me . . . That All the Nations Might Hear,"  which I'd listened to a couple weeks ago:

William Carey, the father of modern missions left for India from England in 1793 and never came home. He labored 40 years without a furlough. He lost two of his three wives in death. When he had a fever they attached 110 leeches to his thigh. And on March 11, 1812—after almost 20 years of work—a fire broke out and destroyed years of irreplaceable work. The draft of the great polyglot dictionary. The Sikh and Telugu grammars. Ten version [sic] of Bible that had been going through the press. The translation of the Ramayana which he and his partners had been working on for six years.

Carey was out of town in Calcutta. When Marshman told him tears filled his eyes, and later he said,

In one short evening the labours of years are consumed. How unsearchable are the ways of God! I had lately brought some things to the utmost of perfection of which they seemed capable, and contemplated the missionary establishment with perhaps too much self-congratulation. The Lord has laid me low, that I may look more simply to him (Mary Drewry, William Carey: A Biography, p. 154).

Source: http://www.desiringgod.org/resource-library/sermons/the-lord-stood-by-me-that-all-the-nations-might-hear / By John Piper. ©2013 Desiring God Foundation. Website: desiringGod.org

When I thought of my blogging in comparison to twenty years of Carey's (and the other missionaries') work in frontier missions, there's really no comparison at all! When I thought of the fact that I have full archives of all my blogs sitting safely in the memory of my laptop (as well as in the time machine backup), there's no comparison at all! And with that, I could see how weak and despicable and unprepared for any true suffering I really was.... And, I could also see how I am too prone to much self-congratulation, and how quickly I can forget that anything I write here of any worth, i.e. - anything that will withstand the fire of God's judgment – is all of Him, and it is all to His praise, honor, and glory alone ~ e.g. - Psalm 115:1; Isaiah 26:12; I Cor. 3:7; John 15:1-8.

At that point, as I considered the fire that consumed years and years of Carey's work, more Scripture (this time from Hebrews 10), was brought to mind to show me once more how I was not resting in Christ as I should have been. This commendation of the Jewish Christians was in such marked contrast to my own state:

I was NOT joyfully accepting the potential plundering of my goods (of my blog writings). I had been too easily been tossed about for I had lost sight of the better and enduring possession -- a knowledge of God Himself through the Lord Jesus Christ!

Holy God, forgive me for hardening my heart and not entering into Your rest. Thank You that Your goodness and mercy pursued me even to the pig sty of my own making, and Your kindness brought me back to my senses and to repentance! Grant me an increased sight and taste of Your glorious and all-surpassing riches. Strengthen me by Your Word and Your Holy Spirit, so that no matter my circumstances (Xanga or no Xanga), I might pray without ceasing and be diligent to enter Your rest, to walk with patience and longsuffering with joyfulness, that I might joyfully accept the plundering of my goods as I more fully and firmly embrace and enjoy You alone as the better and enduring possession, and find everlasting rest, durable peace, strong consolation, unspeakable joy, and unsearchable riches, and an incorruptible inheritance in You alone, even as I walk as a pilgrim here in this uncertain, turbulent, and stormy world. Hallelujah! What a Savior! Gracious God, thank you for laying me low like William Carey, that I may look more simply to You!

Scripture quotations marked ESV are taken from The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. Copyright ©2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved.